


See You Later, Billygator

by bendleshnitz1



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Cussing, F/M, Fingerfucking, Foreplay, Groping, HP: EWE
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-10
Updated: 2012-07-10
Packaged: 2017-11-09 14:12:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/456393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bendleshnitz1/pseuds/bendleshnitz1
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What is the difference between a "goodbye" and a "see you later"? When does one become the other? Who knows for sure that the "see you later" won't become a "goodbye" before they expect it?</p>
            </blockquote>





	See You Later, Billygator

**Author's Note:**

  * For [silvernatasha](https://archiveofourown.org/users/silvernatasha/gifts).



> Originally written as a gift for silvernatasha on the 2011 bill_ficathon

**See You Later, Billygator**

What is the difference between a "goodbye" and a "see you later"? When does one become the other? Who knows for sure that the "see you later" won't become a "goodbye" before they expect it?

This difference is harder to decipher for a new couple. Yes, the passion is still out in the open, there are caresses to be had and looks to be discovered. However, the uncertainty is stronger then. Despite what it may look like or what the people involved think they feel, the bond is not as strong for a new couple as it is for a couple that has been together for a longer time. Still, the latter's bond may be worn out.

So there's not a pattern, is there? One is only left with the hope, waiting. The other clings to those feelings they discovered together; in hopes that they stay intact and are strong enough to bring them back into each other's arms before it is too late.

* * *

_"What are you doing?" Lavender whispered between giggles she tried to repress when a Medi-witch walking down the hall turned her head in their direction._

_"Shhh." Bill's hot breath touched her ear, sending shivers down her spine._

_He waited for the nurse to restart her patrol down the corridors of St. Mungo's and guided Lavender to the door with the sign "STAFF ONLY" with his arms around her waist, pressing his chest against her back and humming to the feeling of the unconscious wiggle her bum made against him._

_He closed the door behind him and quickly spun her around, pressing her back against it. Before she could say anything, he kissed her. "Happy two months," Bill whispered against her mouth, tracing his tongue over her full lower lip._

_"Oh, this is romantic." The sarcasm in her tone didn't reach the smile she tried to hide by biting her lip. Her arms slid around his neck, making him lower his head more, in order to compensate for the height difference. "Here I was thinking you would surprise me with a nice dinner at some fancy restaurant. Or at least some flowers..."_

_Bill chuckled. "I bet this is romantic! You don't remember, do you?"_

_He looked like a little boy. One who had a secret his parents hadn't yet found out. One that cradled his treasure between his small, chubby hands savouring every second that treasure was his and his alone._

_Lavender frowned, searching in her brain for the right answer. Yes, she remembered today was their two month anniversary. Yes, she remembered they had met in this same place twelve months ago. Yes, she remembered the stolen looks and shy smiles they shared every time they bumped into each other in that same corridor they had just been in before she gathered the courage to ask him for a cup of coffee –or a butterbeer- sometime. Yes, she remembered him turning her down and acting all weird afterwards. Yes, she remembered arranging her next appointment with the Healers at a different time Bill's was to avoid the embarrassment of ever seeing him again. Yes, she remembered him waiting for her by the door in spite of that, asking to forgive him, for her to understand him and explaining he needed time, to go slow, because the death of her wife during the war still hurt even after all those years._

_Her eyes widened in realisation. "Wanting to shag me in the same closet we shagged for the first time is not romantic, Bill."_

_"It's not if my girlfriend calls it_ shag _," he said, rolling his eyes._

_"What would you call it then?"_

_"Ermm... making love?"_

_Lavender laughed a breathy laugh. "Oh, you sappy, old man," she teased, caressing his scarred cheek with her hand. "No one calls it that anymore!"_

_"You bloody love it. Admit it," he hissed, grasping her hips and pushing his forward, pressing his erection against her stomach._

_She moaned, half closing her eyes and looking at his through her eyelashes. "All right. Show me how they '_ made love _' in the 80's, baby."_

* * *

The healing of scars is a slow process. The deeper they are, the longer they take. However, a scar is a scar. It will always be there. No magic can make it go away. The fading redness soon turns into this white-ish, stretched, thin skin making it harder to see for anyone who doesn't pay close attention. But, for the scarred person, it will always be there, burning their body with the memory. But which scar is harder to ignore? Which one makes the story behind it most difficult to cope with? The one on the body or the one in the heart?

* * *

_"Tomorrow is the 6th," Molly said, casually glancing at her eldest son from the corner of her eye as she set the tray with tea on the sofa table in the living room, "isn't it?" Her eyes scanned the faces of everyone in the room, lingering for what felt like an eternal second on Bill._

_Bill sighed heavily and everyone turned to look at him with worried eyes. "I know, Mum. Yes, the check up is tomorrow. At eleven in the morning. Happy?"_

_"Oh, that's not what I meant, dear. I was j—"_

_"Save it."_

_"Hey, no need to be rude to her!" Ginny jumped in with that fire in her eyes that lit up every time she stood up for anyone in her family._

_"Yeah... she's just trying to help, mate," Ron mumbled as his eyes jumped from the mug in his hand to where Bill sat and back again._

_"Just like Hermione did, right?" he spat._

_"Hey!" Ron attempted to stand, but Hermione stopped him with a hand on his upper arm._

_"Leave him, Ron," she muttered, swallowing hard and staring at the carpet._

_"No. I won't leave him. We always 'leave him', and I'm tired of it. We're all just trying to help you. Hermione busted her arse off trying to get that bloody law passed so that you can have a normal life. You just have to take an hour out of every month to get a fucking check up and prove to the Ministry you aren't a werewolf and haven't killed anyone lately. Why can't you just suck it up and appreciate her help?" Ron practically screamed. His face turned red with anger and everybody watched the two brothers stare at each other in fury, while Hermione's grip on Ron's arm tightened._

_"Well, maybe you should all know I'm better off without any of your help. I'm a grown man wh—"_

_"Show it, then! Quit whinging like a baby and prove what a man you are." Ron was breathing hard, now turning his eyes to the floor and wiping his now tea-covered hands with a towel. "Fleur would be so disappointed," he whispered, just loud enough for everyone to hear it in the dead silence of the room._

_Everyone gasped and Bill bit his tongue, trying to control his impulses. His hands clutched into fists in order to avoid punching his little brother. He took one deep breath and stood up, making Harry and George tense into a position ready to jump in between them if they came to blows. However, Bill only looked at Ron and whisper defeated "I know" before leaving the house._

_"Well, that turned out well," George said, attempting a smile._

_"Not now, George," Percy said quietly, joining the others in the impotent silence that reigned the room._

* * *

People say that one of the best feelings in the world is to find that other person who has the ability to lighten the room just by walking into it, whose laughter makes you smile –every time, who gives you goosebumps with just one look, who can make you feel alive with only a simple touch. Most die without ever finding that. A small few fool themselves thinking they have found it, and a much smaller group actually finds it.

So, what are the chances of finding it twice?

* * *

_"Ready?" Lavender asked, rising from her chair in the waiting area as Bill walked out of the Healer's office, still buttoning up his shirt._

_"Yeah."_

_"Everything all right?" They knew neither had the active werewolf gene, that the only manifestation of their condition were cravings for raw meat and occasional feisty reactions, but that had never stopped their nerves when facing the Healers each month._

_"Absolutely," he said with a smile and kissed her lightly on the cheek. "Where are we going?"_

_"I don't know. What do you want to do?"_

_"Mmm, Leaky Cauldron?" Bill shrugged, letting Lavender help him with his last few buttons._

_She stared at his chest. "Well... I was... I was thinking..." She met his eyes briefly before focusing on the button one more time. "This is what? Our tenth date?"_

_Bill narrowed his eyes, trying to decipher what she was getting at. "I think so..."_

_"I was thinking...maybe..." Her pointing finger drew a small line over his bare chest, making him swallow hard._

_"Lavender, I—I told you I wa—" he started, wrapping his hand around hers, stopping her from touching him further._

_"You weren't ready. I know," she huffed. "Bill, you know I understand what you're going through –or at least I try. But you also know that this is no walk in the park for me either. You have your wife, I have my scars. There is too much stopping us from taking this…_ thing _–because I don't even dare to call it a relationship now- to the next level and it's unfair that I've got to the point where I have to ask you. It makes me feel shallow and desp—" She took a deep breath, blinking back the tears in her eyes. "You know, I'm done. I- I can't cope with this anymore. It's too hard."_

_Lavender turned around and started walking out of the hospital, breathing hard and trying to ignore the echo of her high heels that weren't accompanied by his strong steps._

_"Lavender!" She stopped dead when he shouted her name. However, the anger didn't let her completely enjoy the happiness that came with him stopping her._

_"What?" she spat, turning again to look at him. Her blonde hair flew around her face and some strands hit her flushed cheek with the sharp movement._

_He strode to where she stood with an intensity in his blue eyes that was mirrored in hers. She took two steps and met him halfway, where their lips collided passionately in a deep kiss._

_Their arms gripped one another's body possessively as hands slid under clothes to touch warm skin and hips collided, rubbing against the other in desperation. Bill walked her to the nearest wall, pressing her against it. His lips left hers for a brief second to kiss her neck as his right hand slid inside her trousers and grasped at her round bum, groaning as his fingers grazed the lacy underwear._

_"Bill," she moaned, moving her head and allowing him more room to explore her neck, but his left hand went to her cheek, brushing his thumb softly against her scar and pulling her mouth to his._

_He laughed into her parted lips. "Is this funny to you?" she reprimanded against his stubble, swirling her tongue against his._

_In response, he moved the hand on her arse lower, sliding between her legs and slipping a single finger inside her, noticing how wet she was. "Not at all," he groaned, thrusting his tented trousers against her. "But we are in the middle of a hospital corridor."_

_Lavender's eyes opened wide and she looked frantically around, relaxing when she saw no one was in sight. With one last chuckle, Bill garbbed her hand and tugged her to the nearest room and entered, drawing his wand to guarantee no one would walk in on them._

* * *

How do you let go of someone you love? It is hard not being selfish when the other one says, "I can stay if you want me to". You swallow hard, bite your tongue and purse your lips choking on the desperate "Yes! Stay! Stay with me!" that your lungs crave to scream.

Is it comforting knowing that by letting your loved one go, you're doing something good for them? Maybe. Perhaps it would be more gratifying if the feeling wasn't shadowed by the fear of losing them forever. But, again, where was the certainty of that? The "see you later" can always turn into a "goodbye", and the pride in yourself for letting them go will turn into blame.

If you hadn't let him go, then he would probably still be with you.

Although there's that annoying word in between. _Probably_. Why "probably"? Why not even in your own suppositions can you be absolutely positive?

* * *

_"I got a letter from Gringotts," Bill said, breaking the silence as he continued playing with Lavender's hair._

_She turned her face to him, still resting her head in his lap. "What did it say?" She tried to hide the hope in her voice. Lavender knew how much he wanted to get his job back, but it was hard for the Goblins to focus on how good he was at the tasks and ignore "the Greyback incident" as everyone called it._

_"I got a job."_

_"Really?" Lavender jumped, quickly sitting in his lap and hugging him with a big smile that wasn't matched by his. "That's great, Bill! Why aren't you—"_

_"It's in Egypt," he blurted, avoiding eye contact._

_"Oh."_

_"Yeah."_

_They sat in silence for a while, thinking about what this meant for them and their relatively new relationship of a mere five months._

_"When are you leaving?" Lavender asked, trying to sound nonchalant._

_"I don't know. Do you want me to leave?"_

_Her eyes met his as she struggled for an answer to that question. Giving their condition (even in spite of the new laws), this was practically a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, but at the same time... "I don't know," she whispered truthfully, leaning against his chest and resting her head against his shoulder as he wrapped his arms around her._

* * *

Waiting. What a horrible thing to do. It leads to a bunch of horrible feelings one tries to avoid day after day. Impotence, anxiety...fear. Even the most patient people abhor the day they have to wait for something... or someone.

Thankfully, it is not in some people's nature to sit and wait for things to happen. Those, the brave and impulsive ones, go and get what they want. Still, it is a fact that doing that does not always guarantee the "happy ending" everyone expects. So, what does? There's simply no way of being certain of anything in this life? It is always a matter of wishing and hoping. Then why do some believe in destiny? Is it just a way of fooling yourself, in finding comfort in the hope that there is something certain in your future, even if you have no way of knowing about it beforehand?

* * *

_Bill wiped the sweat in his forehead with the back of his hand as he made his way to his tent. He had forgotten how hot it got in Egypt, and the sand was definitely more annoying that it had been when he was twenty. The wind grew stronger and stronger every minute, making his long, red hair swirl furiously around his face collecting tiny bits of sand in it. His boss had ordered them to go back to their tents immediately. A sand storm was on its way, and it was too risky staying out in the open, even with magic._

_The calm inside the tent was deafening after walking miles with the wind crashing against his ears. He leaned over and started messing his hair around, trying to get the sand out of it._

_"That's never going to work. I got here three hours ago, have already showered and I am still pulling some sand out with my fingers."_

_Bill froze, straightening up so quickly he felt dizzy for second. "Lavender," he whispered, watching her sitting in the old chair of the small table in the tent with her wet hair falling around her shoulders and wearing a long t-shirt–_ his _long t-shirt- that covered almost all of her bum. Almost._

_"Bill," she imitated with a cheeky smile._

_"What are you doing here?" he asked, still shocked from seeing her in Egypt._

_"You said 'see you later'," she explained with a shrug._

_"What?"_

_"When you left. You didn't say 'goodbye', you said 'see you later'."_

_He frowned and then felt the corners of his lips turn upwards at the sight of her standing and walking slowly towards him._

_"I did," he said with a nod when she was standing in front of him, just a few inches separating them._

_"Well, this is 'later' for me. Two months feels a whole lot longer than I thought."_

_"Indeed." He smiled and lifted her up in his arms, only putting her down when he got to his cot._


End file.
